Above photo is compliments of Ideago@FreeDigitalPhotos.net
Susan Cohn, LMFT & LCSW
Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist
Licensed Clinical Social Worker
21710 Stevens Creek Boulevard - Suite 101
Cupertino, CA 95014-1179
Some times a client wants to be seen individually to explore whether of not they should stay in a relationship.
Other times, a couple comes in after they have given up hope that they can work things out between them and are unsure of what to do next.
My initial goal with a couple or individual, who may be at the end stage of their relationship, is to understand their history and what has lead them to this conclusion.
I typically have them clarify what changes need to occur (and by when) to feel they still have a future together. For the betrayed partner this includes examining what actions they need from their partner in order to feel safe in the relationship. For the betrayer, if is examining what problems in the relationship may have pushed them into another relationship
While I believe in most instances people are better off working through the issues that has caused them to feel distant, that is not always the case. When it is clear is: if one partner is unwilling to work on the relationship or when it is clear that they can not disengage from physically destructive patterns, then talking about separation or divorce becomes necessary.
If, after exploration, the couple decides to move forward with a separation or divorce; my goal would be to help them clarify how to make the transition as supportive as possible. If they have children, I have special protocols to help everyone involved adapt to their changed family circumstances.
If you are thinking of separating from your partner please feel free to contact me to find out more about how I can support you through this process.